Parenting - Preschool

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How To Deal With Backtalk, Part One

Parents,
Think back to the not-so-distant past when you couldn’t wait for your little one to say “Momma”, “Dadda”,
“Bye-bye”, “Thank-you” and all those other wonderful first words.

You were awed and amazed by everything they said. Now that they’ve become preschoolers though, their vocabulary is increasing daily, but now you wish they weren’t quite so verbal.

Our current Online Parenting Class video addresses this issue by offering practical advice and wisdom in dealing with a preschooler’s sassy backtalk in a way that will be pleasing to God while creating an atmosphere of positivity in your home. After you’ve watched the video, please feel free to get back to me in order to share one or two ways this video encouraged you in this area of your parenting journey.

https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/143995452/92cd3758b0

Partnering with you,

Kim Constantino

Take Time For Yourself

Parents,
Hi!
I hope your week is off to a great start!
This month, our Online Parenting Class is on the topic of The Best Thing You Can Do for Your Child,” and addresses the importance of self-care.

The topic of this lesson is especially important because if you aren’t taking great care of yourself, you can’t take great care of your kids. Taking care of yourself is not only good for you and your kids, it’s something God commands us to do because our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit: Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. ~1st Corinthians 6:19-20.

I want to remind you that I love and care about each of you. Please let me know how I help you, and how I can pray for you and our family.

https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/147482215/33143c0879

Partnering with you,

Kim Constantino

Taming The Tantrums, Part Two

Parents,

How’s it going?

I hope you were able to watch our online parenting class on Taming the Tantrums.

Today we’re going to continue the conversation by reading some encouraging Scripture.

Listen to what Ephesians 4:26 says about tantrums: “In your anger do not sin…” Ephesians 4:26 (NIV) Here are two lessons we can learn from this Scripture to help with the tantrums our children have.

1. Preschoolers WILL get angry. As children grow and develop opinions and desires of their own, they will inevitably get irritated when things don’t go their way or when you “mess up” their plan. We cannot expect them to be happy and “roll with the flow” all of the time, especially when it is difficult for us as adults to follow that rhythm.
2. It should be the parent’s mission to assist their preschooler in navigating through their anger. Part of the parent’s job is to help them work through their feelings and teach them how to respond appropriately when feelings of anger arise. One way to do this best is by setting a good example for them in how you respond during frustrating situations.
So as you are engaging your kids today, don’t forget that each tantrum is a teaching moment for them to learn to portray self-control in how they communicate their anger.

We’ll see you in next month’s Online Parenting Class.

This has meant to be a resource that encourages and helps you. Please remember that our ministry cares about your family, and we love serving you!

Partnering with you,

Kim Constantino

: Taming The Tantrums, Part One

Parents,

It’s time for another online parenting class!  I’m Kim Constantino, the new Family Life Minister at Risen Christ. I’m happy to take over for Pastor in reaching out to parents twice a month with information I hope you’ll find valuable on topics relevant to life as a parent in today’s world. Below you’ll find this month’s topic on Taming the Tantrums.

This month we are going to tackle a very important subject that you face as a parent… This month we’re going to talk about taming those bigger-than-toddler-sized tantrums.

This issue is one that you likely face quite a lot. But don’t worry, we’ve got some help for you today. Check out this month’s online parenting class. It will give you a good start towards making positive changes in your home. I hope this lesson is helpful and please feel free to reply to this email with any prayer requests you may have for your family. I love serving you and your family through prayer.

https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/137429766/e1256cad35

Partnering with you,

Kim Constantino

How to Deal with Attitude problems pt 2

 

Parents,

Our last email introduced some ideas on what we can do to deal with attitude problems our kids may have. Bottom line: it’s hard to deal with and can be extremely frustrating. It is easy to become angry and fed up with that behavior. James 1:19 says, “This you know, my beloved brethren. Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger.” Sometimes it is easier said than done. We must keep our temper in check when dealing with our children. You cannot take back words or actions that were said out of anger. If we’re honest, we know that we could handle any parenting moment much better from a state of calm. But in the storm of our anger, we feel righteously entitled to our fury. How can this kid be so irresponsible, inconsiderate, ungrateful? Your child may be pushing your buttons, but he isn’t causing your response.

Children sometimes will act out to get a reaction from parents. Lacking enough positive interaction, a child will develop negative tactics to re-engage the adults. Being scolded, nagged, reminded, and punished is far better than being ignored. Few parents set out to deprive their children of enough parental contact, but many parents are over-scheduled, working too hard, or in distress themselves. Even though they’re doing the best they can, parents who are overwhelmed by the job may inadvertently create a situation where the kids have no choice but to misbehave to ensure a connection. James 4:10 says, “Humble yourself before the Lord and He will exalt you.”

Tantrums also spring from your child’s growing desire for independence. Despite your toddler’s rapidly developing abilities, they no doubt still want to do much more than they can handle physically and mentally. This frustrating incompetence will drive your child over the edge. When their frustration reaches a certain level, it explodes as a tantrum.

Though it hardly seems like it much of the time, your toddler is actually trying to control themselves. And despite all the turbulence, your child will become increasingly self-aware throughout this year. By their third birthday, this self-awareness will probably awaken a previously unseen ability in your toddler: awareness of and identification with the feelings of others. So in the end, your child’s sometimes painful journey toward self-awareness will give birth to a degree of empathy.

Avoid any positive reinforcement of a meltdown. Don’t offer candy or a cookie if they will stop and don’t give them what they want. It’s best to give temper tantrums as little attention as possible. If you’re at home, you may try saying, “When you’re done, we’ll move on,” and let the tantrum take its course. If you’re in public, put yourself in a situation where you have time for the tantrum to play out. If you can leave a store, leave, and return after the tantrum has ceased.

Give your child the power of choice to help her determine the outcome. Try saying, “It looks like you’re having a hard time being calm, do you need to sit down for a while or do you need some help?” Or leave a situation and say: “When you’re calm you can come back.” When you provide choice you empower your child. This not only helps end the current tantrum, but it can help prevent future tantrums from occurring.

Growing up is tough, so is parenting. By working together, we can navigate the tempers and attitudes and reach a peaceful conclusion.

Partnering with you,

Pastor Deknatel

How to Deal with Your Child's Attitude Problem

Parents,

Have you ever looked at your precious child and wonder what has taken over their body? Do they ever misbehave to the point that you wonder where you went wrong as a parent? Know that you are not alone. Attitude problems are a common issue when raising preschoolers. This month we hope to help you find some ways to deal with those attitudes!

https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/126916779/ed61152c82

Partnering with you,

Pastor Deknatel

Playing Well with Others pt 2

Dear Parents

Romans 12:18 says, “If possible, so are as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” Good words to live by, but sometimes this can be difficult, especially for children. Kids are naturally ego-centric and they are not born with the tools to effectively handle conflict. This is where we as their parents must help them to form good social skills and healthy play habits.

We learned in our first email that parents are one of the primary sources for the way our children respond to life. They model behaviors that they see and that are acceptable at home. Playing with your child at home lays the foundation for how they will play with other children. Do you ever get stumped for ideas on what to do at home? Here are some suggestions:

  • Encourage make believe and pretend play.
    Research has shown that pretend play is very important for a young child’s development in number of ways. First, children develop and hone a number of important social skills in the midst of zooming cars and fort building. In fact, when another person is involved, they are able to practice turn-taking, sharing responsibility (for the direction of play), and creative problem solving. In addition, children practice language skills within the context of pretend play. During play, children often experiment with language and voices (e.g., mom calling the children to dinner). Parents and teachers can facilitate this process by introducing new words into the play. Finally, pretend play inspires the imagination and thinking skills.
  • Art Projects
    Granted, this play can get messy, but encouraging your little artist will only increase creativity. Children can become more self confident and assured when they are able to express themselves and art can be a great way to do that.
  • Create something to share with someone else
    Do you have a neighbor, teacher or family member who you would like to reach out to? Have your child help to draw a picture or put together a little gift to brighten their day. This also creates a teaching moment for your child and shows them to think about the feelings of others.

Ultimately, there will be disagreements between kids. It just happens, but how we deal with it can help to ensure the best result. Philippians 2:4 says, “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others”. If your child has frequent disagreements with a friend or sibling, consider practicing some of these techniques at a neutral time when the child is not upset and is not in conflict.

Teach empathy and understanding. Often, children who argue are so caught up in being right, they forget to think about how the other person may be feeling. Help your child understand that a friend may be upset because she feels jealous, sad, or lonely about something, and work on identifying times when your child has felt the same way. This can help your child step back from being “right” and remember to be caring.

Apologize and admit mistakes. It’s not easy (even for adults!), but helping your child learn to admit when he is wrong can take away the fuel that feeds many arguments. Role-playing apologies can be helpful here, but what’s more important is to practice what you preach. Let your child see moments when you admit you’re wrong and try to make amends.

Practice ways to compromise. Help your child understand what compromise is (when a common agreement or solution is reached) and why it’s a valuable tool to use in any relationship. Teach your child how to take a few moments to breathe and main her composure as best she can. Give kids the opportunity to practice compromising with you, too.

Taking the time to work with our kids to form good social skills while they are young will be so beneficial for them as they grow older. You are giving them the tools to be a good friend.

Partnering with you,

Pastor Deknatel

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