Parenting - Teens

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"Helping You Stay Calm..." pt 2

Dear Parents,

As promised, here is your second e-mail of January in our new parenting ministry.  If you missed part 1 or want to read it again, you can find it at;

Below is part two of the topic; Helping you stay calm when your teenager isn’t.  Before you read about that, I want to invite you to a fantastic marriage event we are hosting here at Risen Christ called “Fight Night.”  It is a simulcast with Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott on Feb 12 at 7pm.  It will be fun, funny, inspirational and instructive.  Cost is $10 advance and $12 at the door.  Check it out at;    

Helping you stay calm when your teenager isn’t. 

Would you like to see your teenager have a better attitude?

As the leaders of the home you get to set the attitude example for your teenager to follow.

Philippians 2 displays Jesus’ example of the right attitude.

Here are 3 quick take-aways from Philippians 2 that can help change your attitude in your home this week:

  1. Look to Your Own Interests – This might be a surprise to you, but your interests matter.  Philippians 2:4 it says, “look not only to your own interests but also to the interests of others”  This verse assumes you will take care of yourself before you try to take care of your family.  It is not selfish to take care of yourself.  In fact it sets you up to love your family from a position of health.  It is not wise to give your teenager 100% of you, because if you do there is nothing left over.  What can you do this week to take care of yourself in a way that will make you a better parent?
  2. Look to the Interest of Others – It is not wrong to take care of yourself, but it is wrong to take care of only yourself.  Once you have taken care of yourself in a healthy way than you are free to give yourself away in service.  Some Jewish writing called the Midrash taught that no Hebrew, even a slave, could be commanded to wash feet.  But Jesus chose to do that in John 13 to set a standard of what love looks like.  To love is to serve. The attitude of Jesus was to serve others from a position of health.  This example is one that could revolutionize your home
  3. Serve your teen God’s way.  To serve your teen is not to cave to their whims or their tantrums.  To serve your teen is to give them what they need the most, not what they desire the most.  They may desire to go to THAT party.  You know they need to not go because of your concerns about what might go on there.  God loves you and He loves your teen.  God will only give you what is best for you and you are to give your teen only what is best—translate that Godly—for them.
  4. Relax.  (I know I said 3 take aways from Philippians.  So, I can’t count.)  Relax or rest in God’s love for you and for your teen.  Philippians 2 speaks about Jesus serving sinful humanity out of a fierce and intense love for them—for us.  When your teen is pretty much unlovable (in human terms), know that even then, God still loves them and He still loves you.  That may help you settle yourself, not be reactive to them, but seek to mold and train them in the Lord.    

If your attitude adjusts to look more like Jesus, you might be surprised to see your teenager’s attitude follow that example.

Have a great day!

Pastor Deknatel


"Helping You Stay Calm When Your Teenagers Isn't"

Dear Parents,

Woohoo!  Here is your very first parenting e-mail from our Risen Christ Family Life Ministry.  These e-mails are designed to give you practical, Biblical advice on caring for your teen.  You will receive 2 e-mails each month on the same topic.  We hope you find them helpful.  Feel free to share them with a friend but please don’t post them on social media. 

This e-mail is about; Helping You Stay Calm When Your Teenager Isn’t!

I want to share with you  a very practical tip to help you stay calm when your teenager is not calm.

It’s called the Rewind and the Flash Forward.

You can watch this short video to learn how you can try it out this week in your home.

I hope this helps you to apply what we have been learning.  In our next session we will give ourselves an “Attitude Check”.  I am looking forward to it, and I hope you are too.

Have a great week,